Tag Archives: set up housekeeping

Setting Up Households Versus Forming Communities

Tender Shadows Cover“Back then marriage was two families coming together in a kind of joyous celebration, at least in our case. Nowadays a couple of kids meet at a party and set up housekeeping together. Maybe we didn’t prepare our daughter for that kind of world.”

–Joe Harlan in Tender Shadows

 

Parents may experience a disconnect with their children during the teenage years. Some of the disconnect is healthy. The passage into adulthood requires a measure of independence and the ability to think for oneself. But for some the passage is traumatic and even tragic.

A few parents give up on their children, even before the teenage years. In some cases, they never took responsibility for the children they created. In others, parents are besieged with other problems (loss of job, single parenthood, aging parents, and so own) and cannot cope with everything life tosses their way.

For whatever reason, not all of us are gifted with caring families. Yet most of us crave community. If we don’t find healthy communities, we will find unhealthy ones—drug gangs, those based on dysfunctional relationships, even terrorist groups.

A few days ago, I saw several women walking together down my street. Two were pushing baby strollers. Young mothers sharing exercise and conversation? Non-Facebook friending? I bet the children in those strollers have a good chance to live successful lives, especially if their families continue to share friendship with other families. Forming communities doesn’t have to be complicated. Simple friendship goes a long way