Tag Archives: deal with our grief

The Year I Lost and Found Christmas

My father died when I was thirteen. When the first Christmas after his death approached, my mother was finding it too difficult to celebrate our usual Christmas. She and my brother, seven years my senior, decided we would do Christmas differently that year. We would travel to Florida and perhaps find some enjoyment in celebrating Christmas in new ways—enjoying the seashore and perhaps visiting some historic sites, like St. Augustine.

I, in my teenage angst, was not in favor, but I was overruled. Glumly I went along.

Fortunately, their patience with me was rewarded. Gradually, I succumbed to the lure of travel, which I have always loved. We enjoyed interesting food. I went swimming in the Atlantic on Christmas Day. And as the days progressed, we laughed a lot.

The road from family loss is going to be hard and hurting at times. One cannot lose a loved one without grief. The ways of handling it, however, can lead to acceptance and even growth.

For my family, that trip, which I was so against, gave us new experiences that helped us deal with our grief in ways that grew us even as it healed us.

Especially for a hurting teenager.